Find Me
by Jet MacLeod
Summary: This is the other side of the story FOUND YOU. This is mostly from Regina's point-of-view and will be a multi-chapter ordeal, that may and will possibly lead to more chapters being added to Found You, as this one progresses. I hope you enjoy.
1. Mirror, Mirror

Find Me

Chapter 1: Mirror, Mirror

She sat staring out the window. She wasn't looking at anything. She didn't see anything but her memories. She didn't hear Snow walking up behind her. She didn't care about anything. She knew that there wasn't anything that she could do. She caused her own heartache. She would have to learn to deal with it.

"Regina?"

"Snow."

"We'll find a way."

"I can't go back."

"Sure you can."

"Magic comes with a price and this is mine."

"I refuse to believe that, Regina. Emma found us once. I am sure that she'll find us again."

"She broke my curse because she was meant to do it. She will have no memory of that, Snow. She will have no memory of us. I tried to give her a better life than she had before that, but I can't know if it worked. She will have had Henry from his birth. The rest was up to her."

"She is resilient. She's fine. And, so is Henry. But, we'll find a way to get back to them or to bring them to us," Snow said.

"You would pull them out of their happiness to bring them here?"

"They are family."

"You would sacrifice their happiness to ensure your own?" Regina asked her.

"Wouldn't you?"

"I already did."

Snow looked at her. The curse was supposed to be Regina's happiness, but it wasn't. She was finally beginning to see that when they were cursed back to the Enchanted Forest. Snow has stopped her from burying her heart. She had promised to help her find a way back.

It had been weeks. Regina was losing hope. Rumple was dead. She had no other magical ally to help her in the search to find a way back to the "Land with no magic." She was losing everything again. Snow's promise to find a way was no longer a comfort. She didn't care that no matter what Snow always found a way. She need some sort of instant gratification.

"Regina, we'll find a way. The fairies are looking in old myths and legends. Even Tiny is working with Grumpy in the old gardens to grow some beans. We'll get them back."

"I doubt that Blue wants to help me," Regina stated.

"She isn't doing it for you."

"But, she has to know."

"She does."

"And, yet she is willing to help me?"

"Not everyone holds on to their grudges, Regina. Sometimes we can get past them to help our enemies mostly because it is the right thing to do. Besides, I think that Tink had something to do with it. She has become your patron fairy."

"Tink," Regina said with a laugh, "She'll never give up on me will she."

"She believes in second chances."

"But, I don't deserve one."

"You've proven yourself to me, Regina."

Regina turned sharply to look at her step-daughter, her brown eyes studying the blue hazel of hers. She couldn't see the contempt she used to see there, but only sadness, worry and was it possibly love. Regina gasped when she saw Snow's expression. She had grown not to hate her, but Snow still was Snow and cared for her.

"I…"

"Don't worry about it, Regina. I saw the woman that my father married return. You put Emma and Henry before yourself. There was no hatred in it, only love. I know that. I remember when you used to look at me like that, before Father died. I want them back, too."

Regina cast her look back out the window. There was still nothing new outside. Nothing to catch her eye, nothing to make her forget, there was nothing to help her out the window. She just continued to stare and tried to will her tears not to come.

"Regina?"

"What, Snow?"

"When we came back…"

"Yes?" Regina asked, her obvious agitation apparent.

"When we came back, did Sidney?"

"I am sure that he did," Regina said getting more and more agitated that Snow hadn't left her to her own misery.

"Did he return to the mirror or as a man?"

Regina turned at looked at Snow. She hadn't thought about it. Sidney was a genie. He had powers. She'd exiled him to her glass even after he'd been freed by King Leopold. She might be able to use him again, at least just to see Henry and Emma.

"I don't know," Regina finally answered.

Snow just smiled brighter at her. How they hadn't thought about it earlier, neither of them knew nor did they care at the moment. Snow waited for her to find one of her many magic mirrors. When Regina pulled one out from behind a curtain, Snow just smiled more.

"It might not work," Regina told her.

"It might work, as well," Snow replied.

"I can't believe that I am actually to about to say this. It is almost too cliché even for us, but here goes nothing," Regina said and then sighed, before continuing. "Mirror, Mirror on the wall, are you still there for me to call?"

The mirror swirled and swirled, but a face didn't appear. Regina's hope was crushed. But, Snow reached out to her and touched her hand. She heard Snow's gasp and looked up into the mirror again. It was swirling like it was waiting for another question.

"Ask it something else," Snow encouraged.

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, can you show my son?"

The mirror's swirls changed color and suddenly there was a bright flash of light. When they both opened their eyes, they could see Henry smiling at someone. It was just his face, but it was enough to make Regina begin to believe again.

"We will get them back."

"Yes, I believe that we will."

Regina stared at the mirror long into the night, even after Snow had left. She could see Henry. She hoped that it would be enough to sustain her long enough for her to find a way back to Storybrooke and to the Land without magic. It gave her renewed strength. She would find a way back to her son. She would. She would use the mirror if she had to, but she would do it.

As the hours crept by and morning began to appear in the distance, Regina still sat at her dressing table in front of the mirror. She was watching Henry sleep. He looked so peaceful and happy. It did her heart good to see him like that. She knew that it was wrong to keep watching him, but she couldn't stop herself. He was her son.

It wasn't until she heard the alarm go off in his room that she realized that it was truly morning. She continued to watch, promising herself that she would sleep when he woke. She would watch over his nights, making sure that he was safe and protected, even though she knew that there was nothing she could do from the Enchanted Forest for him. She was amazed at how her heart actually sped up when she saw Emma come into his room and wake.

Suddenly, she couldn't breathe. She remembered being on the deserted road, holding Emma's hand and promising her a better life. She remembered staring into her green eyes and feeling her heart break. It was like a monumental damn had broken and she was going to lose it all again. The sight of Emma, smiling at Henry as she woke him in the morning, broke Regina's heart. There was nothing that she could do about either. She had given them both new memories for their best chance at happiness. They would live on in happiness while she did not. Emma's smile was too much for her.

She waved her hand at the mirror and the image disappeared. She walked back out to her balcony to greet the morning. She took each step with a heavy heart and a determined mind that she would find a way to get back to them, even if it wasn't to Storybrooke. She knew that Storybrooke was gone. She could go to them, wherever they were. They could all be happy there, without magic, but together. That was all that mattered.

Her mind was reeling and she was still unsettled by the happiness that she had seen in Emma's eyes that she hadn't heard Snow come back to her rooms. She was grateful for her step-daughter some days and others the old hatred still boiled in the back of her mind. Every time that she looked into Snow's eyes, she saw her own pain reflected. They had both lost their children, together they were trying to deal with it. Snow tried to comfort her, but Regina only wanted to get rid of her heart. The pain was almost too unbearable some days and with Snow's constant hope, she thought she might slip and kill her only to realize that she would end up destroying herself in the process.

This morning, however, Snow sensed that something was different. She could see it in Regina's body. She could feel it in the air. Regina was different. There was a different emotion racking her body and Snow knew what Regina was capable of when her emotions ruled her head.

"You didn't sleep?" Snow asked as she continued to get closer, noticing the still made bed.

"I couldn't."

"You didn't?"

"I didn't, what?"

"You stayed up all night watching him, didn't you?" Snow asked her.

"He is my son. I only wanted to make sure that he was happy and safe. I am sure that you would have done the same."

"I would."

"Then don't lecture me about it."

"I am not. But, I do know that staring into that mirror is only going to drive you mad. We need to work with Tink and Blue. They'll find a way. If you help…"

"They won't let me help them. My magic and fairy dust doesn't mix. I need to find a way around my darkness. I don't want to cast another curse. I just want to find a way home."

"This is our home."

"No, Princess, this is not my home anymore. It never really was. This was your father's castle. I was just living here for a while. It is your castle now, Snow. Keep it. I'll take my house at 108 Mifflin Street over this place any day."

"Regina?"

"That is my name. I am the daughter of a peasant and a prince. What does that make me? A queen? No, I am nothing more than a princess without a land or titles. I like it that way."

"I will share the kingdom with you," Snow told her.

"I don't want it. I never really did. I just wanted…"

"Daniel…I know," Snow replied.

"No…love. That is all I ever really wanted. Everything I have ever done was to find love. I didn't realize that I couldn't force anyone to love me. I was hurt and angry and I wanted you to feel the same way. I never understood how my magic was creating the darkness I felt and the hole in my heart. I never tried to look for anything better. Hell, even Tink tried to steer me away from the evil and towards Robin Hood, lot of good that did her."

"Blue let her back."

"Yeah, after the debacle in Storybrooke with Pan."

"You've proven that people can change. You've done more in the past three years for us than I ever thought you would. You finally learned that you can earn trust, love and friendship by putting others' feelings before your own. You tried to learn to temper your magic, but even I have to admit that on Neverland, I was glad that you were with us."

"Why?"

"Because I couldn't do what you did."

"What embrace my darkness to save us all?"

"Yes," Snow answered.

"You did once."

"I know."

"I have forgiven you for that."

"I haven't forgiven myself."

"That is what you think of when you get angry now, isn't it?" Regina asked.

"Yes, it is. Every time I feel myself starting to lose control and get angry, I think about your mother. I think about the one person's life that I…"

"You've taken other lives on the battle field, Snow."

"But, I murdered your mother."

"I murdered entire towns. Are you sure you want to play this game? I am sure that I could match your supposed darkness and raise you a curse. That isn't the point. I realized that with my mother's death, you finally realized that life wasn't black and white."

"There is a lot of gray," Snow stated.

"And, while you may never agree fully with my ways of doing things, you understand that sometimes evil is necessary for the means to justify the outcome. You can't order it to happen. You never could. That is what I was there for. I was to take the blame for all the evil that may or may not happen, because I am the one with the dark heart."

"But, you aren't. I remember seeing it in the woods, when you were trying to bury it. It was glowing red with love. I think that Henry healed you, but there is more to it than that, isn't there? There is someone else… who is it, Regina? Who helped you become Regina, again?"


	2. Ending the Curse

**Ending the Curse**

Regina stayed to herself for a few days after seeing Henry. At least Snow was leaving her alone to try to deal with her grief. She would come and check on her occasionally, hoping that Regain didn't take a turn towards evil again. She knew that Snow would come in her rooms and check on her, because there would be fresh flowers or a new book. Once she even came in with Belle. She knew that Belle had been there because of the book they left. She eyed it this morning again, like she had for the last three mornings.

She walked over to the table it was sitting on and glanced at the title once more. MIRROR MAGIC. She could only wonder what Snow was hinting at by leaving the book there. Did Snow think that there was some way that she could use the mirror to get back to Henry and Emma? The only magic that she knew happened with mirrors took you to Wonderland and Wonderland was not somewhere she wanted to be either.

She picked the book up and sat down in front of her dressing mirror. She opened the book and began to scan the contents. She realized that the book was written in a mixture of Latin, Greek, and Elfish. She wondered how Belle came to get the book, but realized that she and Neal had ventured off to Rumple's castle in an attempt to bring him back. She realized that the book was a peace offering and a plea at the same time. If Regina could find a way to get back, then maybe she would help them bring the imp back as well.

She looked at mirror and sighed. It wasn't Henry that was plaguing her so much now. It was the smile on Emma's face. She had given Emma something that she had personally taken from her, twice now, a family. She didn't want to take that from her again. Emma deserved to be happy. It wasn't her fault who her parents were. She was an innocent in all of this, just like Henry.

She was also Regina's reason. She was the catalyst that caused her to change. She along with Henry drove Regina's change. They understood each other in a way that Snow never could. They had bonded over their son and their pasts. Emma was the only person who didn't call her the Evil Queen. She had always referred to her just as Regina, because that was the only side of her that she'd seen.

Her fingers stopped on a page and she stared into the glass. She knew that Snow would ask to see her eventually and she knew that Snow would break, seeing her happiness. She had no one to blame for her problems but herself.

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, can you show me my downfall?" Regina asked it.

The mirror swirled purple and then opened into a scene that Regina knew all too well. She stared down the lonesome road and saw the yellow bug. Suddenly, the mirror zoomed in on Emma and herself.

"My gift to you is happy memories. You will never have been without Henry. He will have always been in your life," she saw herself say, holding Emma's hands.

She shook her head. She didn't want to see this scene. She saw it every day when she slept. She knew the conversation. She'd replayed it in her mind so many times.

"What about you?" Emma asked her.

"We'll all go back. You have to go. It is your best chance, for both of you. Henry needs his mother. I can't go with you. It has to be you."

"But, I just found all of you. I don't want to go alone. I need you."

"You'll be fine, Emma. We'll be with you in your heart. We'll always be with you," Snow told her. "It is your best chance. We love you, both."

Emma was crying. Snow was crying. They were all crying.

Regina started to wave her hand at the mirror. She didn't want to hear it all again. She wanted to find a way to get back, not relive her past.

"Regina?" Emma asked, as Henry said goodbye to his grandparents and his father, Neal.

"Yes?"

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"You fought so hard for this and now, you're losing it all again."

"I know."

"But…"

"Now, Miss Swan, this is all my fault. I am giving your new memories to replace the old. I have to give up the one thing that I love to end the curse. Henry needs you."

"You have to give up Henry."

"Yes, because he has my heart. He always has. He gave me a reason to change."

"Then don't forget him or why you started to change"

"I never will."

"Good."

"Emma?"

"Yes?"

"Whatever your life may be, please be happy. That is all I want for you both now. You can't have your family, but at least you can be happy."

"I am sure that we will…be happy."

"You won't remember us, so you will not bear the pain of this day once you cross the line. The last few years won't exist for you. I'll do what I can to make the transition easier for you, but the rest is up to you both."

"I am sure that we will be okay."

"You're a Charming, of course, you will."

"Regina, do one thing for us," Emma told her.

"Anything," Regina told her.

"Find a way to bring us back together."

"You won't remember any of this. Why would I rip you out of your happiness just for my own? Why would you ask that of me?"

"Because I'm the Savior," Emma told her.

"I can't do that. I won't do that. I won't be the reason that anyone is in pain anymore."

"Then, find some reason to come save you all. Make me believe again. Give me a reason."

"I won't do that."

"You will. I know you will. You can and you must."

"Why, Emma? Why must I find a reason to bring you back to us? What is it?"

"Look inside yourself and you'll see why," Emma told her.

Regina just stared at the mirror. She knew now what Emma was alluding to, but hindsight was always twenty/twenty. Why couldn't Emma just tell her then? Why couldn't she tell Emma?

"Find me, Regina. Find me and bring us back together. Cast another curse if you must."

"You know I won't do that," Regina told her.

"Then, you will only succeed in breaking more hearts," Emma told her.

She pulled Regina into her and hugged her. They walked to the line. Henry hugged and then got in the Bug. Emma stared at her one last time.

"Regina…"

"Emma, you need to go. I…we don't have much time. You have to get to safety."

"Find me, Regina. I know that you can. You are the only one who can. Don't fight it this time."

"Don't fight what?" Regina asked as Emma got in the Bug.

As Emma drove away, Regina turned to fight the curse, by destroying her own. She took one last glimpse at the Bug to make sure it was over the line before she raised her hands and let her magic flow. She swore that she could hear Emma's voice on the wind as the two curses battles around her. She swore that she heard her Emma say "love."

Regina collapsed on her dressing table. She flicked her hand at the images and the mirror went quiet again. She started crying. She let everything go. She left her heart in Storybrooke and it didn't matter how much hope she had. She wasn't starting to feel better. She didn't want to feel better. She wanted Henry. She wanted Emma…

She sat up and stared at herself in the mirror. She saw the puffiness in her eyes and the redness that the crying has created. She wasn't her presentable self. She hated it. She hated feeling this way and there was nothing that she could do to stop it. She wasn't in control and she was breaking a little more each day.

She knew that Snow was still coming in to see her. She waited today. Today, she needed company. Today she needed someone else to talk to her.

"Regina?" Snow asked, as she entered with a plate of lunch.

"Snow."

"You haven't eaten in days. Please eat something. Will you please eat?"

"Yes, if you stay."

"You want me to stay?"

"Please, just for a while."

Snow crossed the room and set the plate down. She took another seat near the plate, and watched as Regina came over and sat down. She watched her eyes, her body and the way she moved. Snow could see the pain and wanted to do something for her.

"You got the book, I see," Snow stated.

"I did."

"Have you read any of it?"

"I skimmed it."

"Did anything stand out to you?"

"Not really."

"Can we use it?"

"If we wanted to go to Wonderland, and I have no desire to go there."

"Oh," Snow replied, slightly upset by the revelation.

"Don't give up."

"Why are you telling me that?"

"Because if you give up hope, I will."

Snow realized then what her presence had been doing for Regina. She wasn't the reason that she was staying on the path of good. She was fostering her hope and helping her maintain some semblance of normalcy. Snow was feeding her hope in spades. She was helping Regina survive.

Snow took her hand in her own. She gave it a squeeze and then smiled at Regina. She knew that their unlikely alliance frightened some of the citizens of the Enchanted Forest, but Regina had yet to do anything new to them.

"I won't."

"Thank you."

"Don't thank me, yet. I have a favor to ask of it. That is if you think that you can do it."

"You want to see Emma?"

"Please."

"Alright, Snow."

Regina started to stand up but Snow caught her arm. "Eat first," she told her. Regina looked into her blue hazel eyes and nodded. She picked at her plate, but managed to eat enough that Snow wouldn't worry about her for a while. It was enough to help her strength.

She pushed the plate from her. She took Snow's hand and led her over to the mirror. She had Snow sit down in front of her dressing table. She placed her hands on Snow's shoulders.

"Mirror, Mirror on the wall, show me the Savior of us all," Regina told it.

The mirror swirled and swirled. Regina cocked her head and waited. The swirling continued. Snow looked up at her and wondered what happened.

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, show me the Swan!" Regina demanded.

The swirling stopped and parted. The image of Emma came into focus and they both gasped. She was smiling at someone while sitting behind a wooden desk. Her name was on a plaque in front of her on the desk.

"Emma…" Snow whispered.

Regina dug her hands, harder, into Snow's shoulders. She was frozen to the spot. Emma's smile was radiant as always and she was afraid that her face would betray her feeling to Snow.

"Can we hear her?"

Regina waved her hand in front of the mirror. Emma's voice began to come through the mirror. It was like a weird TV show.

"You jumped bail, Quinton. You cost me twenty grand and you want me to let you go. I don't think so. You are going to county tonight and tomorrow, you'll appear before the judge for sentencing. I will collect my money back from the court and our business will be over."

"Come on, Swan. You can't do this. I've got mouths to feed."

"Maybe you should have thought about that before you skipped town and broke the law. If you wanted to help you kids, maybe you should have found a more legal profession. Stealing money from the banks is not the way. You aren't Robin Hood. And, life isn't a fairy tale. Life is hard."

"Tell me about it," he replied.

"You don't want me to. Just know that I understand where you are coming from. If you hadn't skipped then you might have only gotten a few months, but you did. You're looking at five years now. I can't help that. You did it to yourself. Maybe next time your think about it more before you decide to run from me. I haven't lost a man yet."

"Yeah, right, I know about you and your men," he stated.

"What does that mean?" she questioned him.

"Everyone has heard the rumors."

"What rumors?"

"Your guy got you knocked up and left you to take the fall. I mean come on Swan. We all know that this was the only job that you could get. Who is going to hire a single teenage mother ex-con? Give up your high and mighty I follow the law attitude. You are no better than the rest of us. You stole to survive."

"I did. I'll admit that, Quinton. I stole food to eat."

"And, you're going to lecture me on being a thief?"

"I am not lecturing, just stating facts. What do you expect? Think about what you did. I did. I changed what I was and became a law abiding citizen. You can do that, too."

He started to stand up.

"Don't think about it. The cops will be here any second and you are going with them. Just remember to keep your head down and don't screw anybody and you'll make it out."

"Fuck you, Swan!" he called out.

Regina could feel her anger building. She wanted smack the man after what he said to Emma. She could feel Snow's anger building toward the man as well. Without thinking she raised her hand and made a quick gesture. The man Emma called Quinton fell out of his chair.

Emma stood up to check on him. Regina's eyes went wide and Snow gasped. Regina looked at her hand before waving it in front of the mirror ending their session.

"I need sleep. I am sorry. Maybe we can look again later, after I've rested."

"Sure, Regina. I'll bring Charming. I am sure that he would like to see Henry and Emma both."

"Thank you, again."

"For what?"

"Not letting me give up," Regina stated.

"We'll find a way. We always do. And, we always will, Regina. It's our thing."


	3. Dinner Belle

**Dinner Belle**

It was late in the evening when Snow came back to Regina's room. It was almost surreal the amount of care that Snow was giving her. She knew that it was Snow's nature, but She Still wondered at her motivation. She couldn't help but think it was just so they could use her magical talents to get back to the Land Without Magic.

She noticed that David followed her this time. He was carrying two plates of food. Belle was behind him, carrying two as well. Snow ushered them over to the table and began to spread out a table cloth, utensils and cups. David and Belle set the plates and Snow produced a bottle of wine. She poured the wine while Regina just surveyed the scene.

They were all acting like nothing had ever happened between them. She could believe that her enemies were now her friends and they were preparing to dine with her. She shook her head. Emma and Henry had really saved them all and healed their hearts.

"Please come eat with us," Snow told her.

"Well, since you've made yourself at home, I guess I will," Regina replied with her usual snarkiness.

Snow smiled. Regina was starting to come back to them. She knew that it was a good sign, but she was also worried about what Regina was doing at night, alone and just with the mirror. Snow was trying to watch her and help her. She was doing it for Henry and Emma, but she was doing it for Regina as well. She didn't want her to fall back into her darkness. She realized now, after everything, how tempting the dark could be and how easy it could be to accept it.

"Thank you for dining with us," Belle told her as Regina joined them at the table.

Regina gave her a look. She couldn't understand Belle. The woman was a paradox walking. She loved Rumple, which in itself, puzzled Regina.

"Regina," Charming started, "How are you feeling tonight'?"

"I am tired, but I am doing better. Thank you for asking. You didn't have to, though. I know why you are here. I understand it. I will help you."

"I am not trying to butter you up, Regina. We are Worried about you. You've locked yourself up in her for weeks. You need to leave this room," he told her.

"I am fine, David."

"You're pale, Regina. At least go riding with us tomorrow, it will do you good. I know how much you missed your horses," Belle told her.

Regina watched them all. She knew that they meant well, but she didn't want to go outside. She didn't feel like being social. She wanted to stare into the mirror and read the book on mirror magic until she could figure out a way to get back. She didn't care how long it took. She didn't care if her health suffered some. It would be worth it in the end once she was back with Henry and Emma.

"I know that I agreed to show you Emma in the mirror, but this is too much."

"Regina," Snow started.

"No, don't, please don't. I am not going to argue with you. I will show you Emma, but beyond that, I promise nothing," Regina stated.

"We aren`t asking you for anything," Snow replied.

"Aren't you?"

"No, we are trying to help you. We don't want you to be suffering so much. Henry wouldn't Want this for you. Regina, you need to get out of this room," Belle told her.

"I am doing this for Henry," Regina shouted as she pushed back from the table and stood.

Regina didn't wait for them to do anything. She stormed across her room. Snow jumped up immediately and followed her. She wrapped her arms around Regina and hugged her tightly.

"I know it hurts."

"Let me go," Regina said only loud enough for Snow to hear.

"Snow," Regina said in warning.

"I know how you feel. I am not letting you go. I will fight you if I have to, but you have to realize that staying locked up in here and staring at the mirror isn't healthy."

"I don't care if it is healthy. I just want to be happy. I can't be happy without Henry and without..."

"I know. You have a hole in your heart. You think that you'll never be happy again. I am not saying that it will be easy. I know that we are looking for ways to get back to them. But, Henry wouldn't want this. He wou1dn`t want you to waste away to get back to him."

"I am doing this for him."

"No, you aren't. You are taking the easy way out. You are hiding."

"I do not hide."

"You are hiding behind the mirror, Regina. I've let you alone this long, but I can't anymore. I will not let you waste away in here. Come riding with us in the morning."

"If I agree, will you leave me a1one?"

"I'll give you one week," Snow told her.

"Then, I'll go riding with you," Regina replied, slumping in defeat.

Snow smiled at her, as she turned her around and released her. Regina's eyes were blurry but she saw the reassurance in Snow's eyes. Snow took her by the waist and led her back to the table and dinner. She sat down and looked across the table at Belle. Her blue eyes were haunted but she was trying to reassure Regina as well.

"Belle?" Regina asked.

"Yes," Belle answered.

"When are you going back to Neal?"

"Next week sometime, I believe. There are some books here that I want to check out first in your old library. Why? Did you want to come back with me?"

"I might."

"Can I ask why?" Snow asked her.

"Because I am sure that Rumple has some books that I need to look at," Regina replied.

Snow seemed to be satisfied with answer, but Regina could tell that she had some reservations about Regina leaving. She wouldn't hold her back, but she was afraid of what would happen with Regina once she was at Rumple castle, possibly unsupervised. She knew how much dark magic he possessed and she could only hope that Regina wouldn't digress back into the darkness while she was there. Regina gave her a reassuring smile in hopes to elevate the worry that overcame them all at her request to go to Rumple's castle.

Regina turned back to her plate and began to eat in earnest, She knew that they would Worry, but she would try to make them understand that she wasn't going to slip. She was going to find a way to get back to them. Rumple's library was the best magical library in all the kingdoms. He would have tomes that no one else did or had even seen before. Regina thought it was their best chance. She just needed to find something while she was there to prove it to them when she came back.

She was thankful that Belle didn`t push her for more information. She was grateful that she was being nice about the situation. She knew that Belle didn't have to be, but she knew that Belle would probably be more apt to talk to her about finding a way to bring Rumpelstiltskin back to life once they were away from the Charmings.

"I only have one question," David said, breaking the silence.

"Yes?" Regina inquired.

"Was Emma happy when you saw her?"

"She didn't tell you?" Regina replied in question, turning gaze to Snow.

"She said she was, but...I need to know. Is my daughter happy? Can you tell me that?"

"She seemed happy enough. She was at work, but she didn't seem be angry or depressed. The few times that I have caught glimpses of her with Henry, she was well. She is always smiling when she is with him. They seem to have a good life in New York," Regina told him.

He sat back in his chair, a little harder than he meant and said, "Good I'm glad. That's good."

Regina watched as his body changed. He didn't need to see her in the mirror. He just needed to know that his daughter was happy. That was all he wanted for her and Regina knew it. She was glad that she could give him that. He gave her his electric smile. He stood up and began to clean up the table since they were finished with their meal.

"I'll clean up. I'll leave you all to look after them. She's happy. She's well and doing well. I'm glad," he told them as he continued to clean the table.

Snow just watched him as he gathered everything up and left Regina's mom. She turned to look at Regina. She didn't have Charmings faith, not all the time, but she was grateful that Regina didn't point it out now. They shared the bond of their missing children. It was bringing them closer, like sisters.

"Regina?"

"Yes, Belle?"

"Are you sure that you should do this?"

"That I should do what?"

"Are you sure that you should use the mirror like this?"

"It is the only connection that I have to Henry. It is no longer a choice. It is a must for me. I have to see my son."

"But, it is hurting you."

"It hurts worse not being able to see him."

"I understand that you are hurting, but sometimes it is better to let go and…" Belle started but was cut off by a very stern look from Regina.

"I will never give up on my son."

Belle just gave a very slight grin and shook her head. Snow joined them. She saw the tension between them, but didn't say anything. She knew how bad it hurt Regina to see Henry but not be able to talk to him, not be able to touch him, and not be able to love him like a mother.

"Are you ready?" Regina asked as she sat in front of the mirror.

Belle stood beside them. She picked up the book that she'd left weeks ago. She saw the pages had been dog-eared and she could tell the pages that Regina had been studying. She flipped through it and landed on a section in Greek. It looked like Regina had been studying that page heavily. It mentioned something about affecting through the mirror. She looked up into the mirror and into Regina's face. There was a shared recognition. She wondered what Regina was trying to do. Did she think that she could affect Henry and Emma through the mirror? She met Regina's eyes just as she raised her hands and began to speak to the mirror.

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, will you show me the child of the fairest of them all?"

The mirror swirled. Belle watched intently at the purple smoke swirling inside the glass. She actually gasped when she saw a vision beginning to form before her. She was further amazed when Emma came into view. Henry was with her.

"Ma?" Henry asked.

"Yeah, kid?"

"I thought that Jacob was coming over tonight."

"Nope, not tonight."

"Something happen with him."

"You could say that."

"What?" Henry just flat out asked.

"I had to bond him today."

"For what?"

"Failure to appear and some stuff I don't want to get into, okay," Emma told him.

"Bad stuff?"

"Yeah, bad stuff, kid. Let's just say that he had me completely fooled. I am not sure what I actually saw in him to begin with. Anyway, it'll be just us for a while."

"I can handle that," Henry answered.

"Did you like him?"

"He was alright, Ma. Don't worry about him. He should have known better. You are the best bounty hunter bail bonds person on the East Coast. He knew what he was getting into. It's his fault, not yours. You'll find someone. I am sure of it."

"I wish I had your faith in things, kid, but thanks."

"Can we go to Boston for the weekend?"

"You want to go to Boston?" Emma asked him.

"It is what we do. You break up. You mope a little. I try to cheer you up. We go back to Boston to visit. You drop me off with James and David. You go out with Paddy and get drunk. Sunday we drive back to the City and we go on like it never happened," Henry told her.

"That predicable huh?"

"Yeah, Ma, you kinda are," he answered, picking up a cup of cocoa with cinnamon sprinkled on top and taking a long sip.

She pushed a plate of breakfast at him. She sat down with her own. She watched her fourteen year old son before she picked up her cocoa and took a drink. She sat down her mug and stared into his hazel eyes.

"How about I call Paddy and see if he can get us tickets to a Sox game?"

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. I think they are playing at home this week. We'll catch a game, hang out with some old friends and not go out and get drunk. Sound good?" Emma asked.

"Sounds awesome," Henry replied.

They both turned to their plates and began to eat their breakfast in earnest. Regina smiled as she watched Henry devour his meal. _At least he has a good appetite, _she thought to herself.

"Henry, hurry up or you're going to be late going to school."

"You can't drop me off today?"

"Nope, I got to go to court to collect my bail reimbursements. It's pay day kid. I gotta go if you want to eat next week."

"Okay, Ma. I'll take the subway. I won't be late. I promise."

"Is your pass okay?"

"Yeah," he replied.

"Need some lunch money?"

"Nope, I'm good."

"Text me if you need me. Don't get caught doing it though. And, if Leo or Jeff wants to go, too, let me know. I'll try to get extra tickets for the game. I'll call their parents later to clear it if they want to go. Now, get a move on," Emma told him.

They watched as Henry finished what little bit was on his plate and ran off to finish getting ready for school. The scene didn't leave Emma. They watched as she finished her breakfast and cleared the table.

It seemed so mundane. But, Snow just kept watching her daughter in the mirror. She watched as she washed off the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. She watched her as she add soap and started the dishwasher. It was the simple things that amazed them all. It was just all so normal, but it was foreign, too.

Henry came back into the room in a blur. Regina noted the private school uniform. She was grateful that Emma made enough that she could afford to send him to a better school. He took another sip of his cocoa before he slammed the mug on the table, snatched his satchel, ran around the table, gave Emma a quick kiss on the cheek and ran out the door.

Emma stood in the kitchen for a minute with a smile on her face, but shook her head at her son. She took care of his mug. She then went into her own room and dressed for court.

"Five bounties, ten bails fulfilled, not a bad week, Swan," she told herself.

The mirror swirled and the vision was gone. Snow turned to look at Regina. She could tell that she'd used a great deal of energy to give her the vision, but she wondered why it ended so quickly. She didn't want to push Regina.

"Thank you," she told her instead.

"Maybe later, I can show you more," Regina told her.

"You need your rest," Belle told her.

"I know. I will. I promise."

"Can I stay and talk with you for a while?" Belle asked her.

"If you would like," Regina told her.

"Good night, you two. We come get you for the ride tomorrow. Have a good night," Snow told them as she left them alone.

"What did you want to talk about?"

Belle held up the book. It was open to the page she'd found earlier. Regina stared at the page and then back at the blue eyes of Belle.

"Want to tell me what you are trying to do?"

"I am trying to find a way to my son."

"You are trying to go through the mirror?"

"I can't. The only land accessible through a mirror is Wonderland. I don't want to end up there. I hate that place."

"Then what are you trying to do?"

"I am trying to give Henry a message."


	4. Family Matters

**Family Matters**

Regina sat up in bed. Something about a dream she had forced her awake. She tried to remember what it was that woke her up. She couldn't remember. She felt drained. She could only think that it was the night before. She figured that she had used too much energy summoning in the mirror and it finally caught up to her.

She knew in the back of her mind that Snow and Belle were right. She needed to get out. She needed to eat. She needed to live…for Henry…and for Emma. She would be no use to anyone if she couldn't use her magic or find a way back. She would find a way back. She knew she would now. She had to.

She decided that the ride would be a good thing. She didn't need to be in her rooms wasting away. She remembered how when she was little and younger that riding would invigorate her and she would be able to think more clearly. That was true until her mother had become strict about her riding and wanted her to focus more on her magic. Riding would help her clear her head and help her figure out what she was really feeling for Emma.

She shook her head. She hadn't really entertained the idea of liking Emma Swan past the fact that she was a co-parent to their son. She had grown not to hate her because of what happened in Neverland, but she still didn't know that she was infatuated with her. She was a pretty woman even Regina could see that, but there were some qualities about her that Regina would never get behind. She smiled at herself and laughed. She was actually entertaining a relationship with Snow's daughter and she wasn't even in the kingdom. Regina laughed at herself and knew that she did need to get out. She was going crazy.

Belle knocked on her door a few moments later and then came in. Regina realized by the shocked look on Belle's face that she wasn't prepared for her to be awake, much less dressed and ready to go. She knew that she had agreed to go riding with them, but they have all figured that Regina would come up with a reason not to go when she awoke.

"Don't look so shocked, dear," Regina told her.

"Sorry, I just thought…"

"I would feign a headache. I thought about it. But, I must admit that the idea of a ride does sound appealing. And, you were all right. I do need to get out of these rooms."

Belle's mouth dropped. She thought that she would never see the day that Regina would agree with Snow. But, everything about Regina had changed. Storybrooke had changed her. Henry had changed her. And, if Belle was right, there was something about Emma that changed Regina, too. She could see it in Regina's face. The Evil Queen had subsided and Regina was the only person left. Regina was pleasant enough, but sometimes the stubbornness and the cocky controlling nature of the Queen would show through.

"Did you sleep well?" Belle asked her.

"As well as I can."

"You can talk to me, if you want," Belle stated.

"Why would I do that, Dear?"

"Because you need a friend."

"And, you want to be my friend?"

"I think that you have changed. I know what it is like for everyone to believe you are something that you aren't. I was a princess in my kingdom, but I gave it up to save it and stay with Rumple. I didn't want the crown and the trappings. I wanted adventure and love."

"And, Rumple gave you that?" Regina questioned.

"Well, he gave me books. I found my adventures in the tales and tomes I would read. He loved me in his own way. When he realized that I loved him and he loved me, thanks to you wanting me to kiss him, he sent me away. He chose power over love. But, I never stopped. I kept looking for a way back to him, a way to make him see that he could love me and we would be alright. I figured out what I wanted to do, when you cast the curse," Belle explained.

"And, now, he is dead," Regina said with a little bit of sorrow in her voice.

"But, he might not be."

"I knew you would ask, eventually. I can't bring him back. I won't bring back the dead. That is the only rule that I refuse to break with magic. Bad things happen when you play with the dead."

"I am not asking you to bring him back. I am asking for you to let me help you find a way back to Henry. Love finally starting curing your black heart, Regina. Love will always find a way."

Regina stared at her. She didn't understand Belle and at the moment she didn't need to understand her. They just needed to get along so they could find a way back to Storybrooke.

"I don't understand why you are willing to help me," Regina told her.

"I am not you and that is the simplest answer I can give you. I could just as easily watch you rot away here in this castle and get my revenge, but I am not you. You're hurting. I have only ever seen you in pain, except when you are with Henry. He makes you human and a real person. That person is the person that Emma became friends with. It was that person that did everything that they could to help Rumple fight Pan and it is that person that I am helping now."

"I don't deserve your sympathy," Regina replied.

"No, you don't, but you have it anyway," Belle told her, taking her hand and leading them out of Regina's rooms and down towards the dining hall, "But, first we are going to have breakfast. After that we will go for a ride with David and Snow. Then, you and I are going to spend some quality time with some books that I brought."

"Are you trying to bond with me Belle?"

"Any bonding that may happen between us, Regina, will be purely coincidental."

Regina laughed. It was an interesting sensation for her. She couldn't remember laughing in weeks. Belle had managed to push the right buttons to make her see what she was doing to herself was self-destructive and not the way that Regina would normally handle things. She thought about herself in the third person sometimes, because it was easier for her to deal with what she had done and become, like they were other people.

Snow watched them as they walked in. She could see the smile on Regina's face and it made her happy. They had succeeded in getting her out of the room for once, and to a meal. Now, if she really agreed to go for the ride, then Regina might actually be saved.

"Good morning," Snow said, greeting them.

They both stopped short, oblivious to the fact that Snow was in the room with them until they were greeted by her. Regina let a small grin grace her face as she looked into the worried hazel eyes of her step-daughter. Belle just gave of the mirth that was natural to her. She just exuded happiness sometimes. Even though she was in pain, she always thought of others first.

Regina's face faltered a little when she realized that Belle was always worried about everyone else but herself. Coming to Regina, even though it was through Snow, was the most selfish thing that Regina could ever think of that Belle had ever done. Putting others first was her forte. But somehow even in trying to get back, Regina figured that Belle was helping to help everyone else. She knew that Belle was looking for a way to bring Rumple back. The entire situation reminded her of Emma, who like Belle put others before herself because she was afraid to get too close, and whose only selfish moments had been about Henry with Regina.

"Let it go for now," Snow told her as she took her hand and led her to a seat at the table.

"Let what go?" Regina asked her.

"Whatever thoughts plague you this morning. Today is going to be a good day. Today we are going to eat as friends. Then we will go for a ride with David. Later, I am told, that Belle has some more books for you to look through. Tonight, Blue and Tink are coming for dinner. I hope that you will both join us. I am sure that you will all some things to discuss," Snow explained.

"I am sure that we will," Regina said flatly.

Regina took her seat and ate in silence. Her mind was racing about what Blue and Tink might have found. She wondered if Blue would even speak to her. Tink would talk, she knew that, but would she have anything of interest for her regarding finding a way back to the Land without Magic.

She stared across the table at Belle. She didn't understand how she could be so serene when the love of her life was gone. Her own heart was in turmoil. She'd lost Henry. She couldn't get Miss Swan out of her mind for some reason and she was living with Snow. Her life was nothing that it should be. Belle was just too damn happy for her. She admired her bravery and her loyalty, but even Belle had to be upset about the situation.

"Are you not in pain?" Regina asked out of the blue.

Snow just stared at her. Belle's eyes betrayed her exterior calm. She sat her fork down on her plate and regarded Regina closely. She'd wondered when Regina would return to her full self and begin to question everything that they were doing. It was only natural for them. Snow and David wouldn't give up. Belle would be optimistic even when she didn't have reason to be. And, Regina would find a way to spoil everyone's mood. It was inevitable.

"I don't show it the way you do, no, Regina. I am in pain. I have been in pain since the moment he struck himself with his own dagger to save us all from his own father. I am sorry that I don't go about ranting and raving. I am not trying to destroy anything. I am trying to live. I am trying to find away if it is at possible to bring him back. Not only for myself, because that would be terribly selfish of me, but for his son and his grandson, Henry. Like you, I am thinking of Henry, because that boy deserves all the love her can get," Belle told her, actually getting angry.

"Well said, Belle. I didn't know that they librarian had teeth. Thank you."

Snow and Belle just stared at her. Once again, Regina had managed to get them riled up because she needed someone to be angry with her. She needed a reason to do anything. Their anger would fuel her need to make them happy with her again and give her a sense of purpose since they were back. The mirror had aided her pain, only to cause more, she had to lash out in order to become herself again. Somewhere in all the commotion, Snow understood what she was doing and turned to Regina.

"If you want someone to yell at, yell at me," she offered.

Regina turned to her. Meeting her hazel eyes with fire in her own soul searching dark brown, Regina smiled. She needed someone to spar with. Emma wasn't there to keep her on her toes. Snow reasoned that as her mother, she would have to do for Regina.

"If you insist," Regina replied.

"I do. I can handle you tirades and tantrums. I have survived them all. Belle however was locked in a basement hospital wing for twenty-eight years. Forgive me if I fight back."

"No, forgiveness is needed. "

"You need someone to fight with, don't you, Regina? You need someone to spar with. You need the competition. What did your mother do you?"

"That is none of your concern, Dear."

"It is when you are under my roof. I know that I said that I would share the castle with you, that we could try to rule as one, but I can't do that if you are going to go all Evil Queen when the mood suits you. I asked Regina to be with me here. I asked Regina, not the Evil Queen. I asked my step-mother, my friend, and the mother of my grandson to share her life with us until we could fix everything. If you plan on ripping another heart out and starting another curse, I will not hesitate to kill you this time, Regina. I promise you that," Snow said, placing her fork down on the table with force.

"Good. I need to know that. I need to know that you aren't going to let me slip."

"What are you saying?"

"I need someone to keep me in check. Do you think that it is easy for me to be here, feeding on all this magic? To know that the only way that I can get back to Storybrooke is to destroy the one thing that I love most? The only problem with me trying to enact another curse of that magnitude is that the thing I love most is in the Land without Magic. I can't destroy the heart of what I love most when I can't even get to it. So, on that note, we are safe from a curse," Regina spat at them.

"You've been in that room too long," Belle stated.

"I know that. But, at least in there, I am slightly happy. I can see Henry. I can see that he is happy. I am not afraid of learning to live without him," Regina replied.

"You are mourning him?" Snow asked, rhetorically.

"Aren't you?"

"No, because I know that Emma is still alive. I believe that we will find a way back to them. I have Charming and together we can do anything. I also know that because of the mirror and what you have shown me of Emma that she is happy. That is all I ever wanted for her."

"That is all I want for Henry, too," Regina stated, starting to cry.

"Then, you need to be happy. Henry is happy because he has Emma. Emma is happy because she has Henry. They have each other, just like we do. We'll just have to learn to deal with each other. I know that you gave up everything to save us all, Regina."

"Yes, and what has that gotten me?" Regina quipped.

"Your life."

Regina turned and stared at her step-daughter. Hazel met brown and the emotion was palpable. Regina looked down, ashamed with what she had done and said.

"I am sorry."

"Don't be. I am just as angry as you are that we are here. But, I am not going to sit in a room, staring at mirror, while my grandson and daughter are in another realm. I am going to fight my family like I have always done."

"And, what I am supposed to do?"

"You are supposed to fight beside me and with me, until we get OUR family back."


	5. For Whom Belle Tolls

**For Whom Belle Tolls**

Regina went back to her room. She was tired. She was tired of trying. She wanted to be alone. She needed to be alone. She fought everything in her being to go to the mirror. She knew that Snow and Belle were right. She needed to find a way to fight back and find a way home. She would take Belle's offer and go to Rumple's castle.

She was beginning to admire her step-daughter. She knew that Snow hadn't had an exactly easy life. Neither had she, but Snow was the one more willing to fight for what she wanted now. Regina could only wonder at where her own fire had gone. She wasn't angry. There was no one to hate but herself. There was no one to keep her on her toes and make her fight back. She didn't know when she had become so passive and she was mad that it was Snow that told her that. She smiled when she thought about how Snow was pushing her to fight.

"Our family…" Regina mused aloud.

The thought gave her some happiness. Snow was allowing her to join their family. She didn't care about the past. She knew that Regina was also Henry's mother and as such was a member of the Charming clan by default, even though she was still technically Snow's step-mother. There were so many years and so many things that separated them both now. They were two different people from who they were before the Curse. They could both admit that.

"Regina?" Snow asked, bringing her back.

"I'm sorry. Did you say something?" Regina asked, smiling at Snow.

"No, I didn't. It is good to see your smile. I am assuming that they were happy thoughts."

"They were."

"Belle wanted me to let you know that she is leaving in the morning. You are welcome to go with her. I…just want you to be happy," Snow told her.

Regina did something that she knew that she had never done before. She crossed her rooms to the barely showing pregnant Snow and hugged her. Snow went stiff for a moment and then she returned the hug. Snow pulled away slightly and looked into Regina's eyes.

"Are you okay?"

"I am better. Thank you for yesterday. I know, now, that I needed that."

"I meant what I said, Regina. I need you to want to fight. We are going to find a way to be together again. Hopefully it won't take twenty-eight years this time, but I know that we will find a way," Snow told her.

"I should hope not. I promise you this. I will find a way, even if I have to cast the curse again."

"Hopefully, that won't be needed," Snow added.

"I don't know that it will, but it is always a back -up plan. I just don't know how I will be able to cast it, now. I will find a way. Oh, dear," Regina said, "I am really becoming a Charming, aren't I?"

Snow laughed, before she said, "It is what we do. We always find a way to each other. Being Henry's mother makes you an honorary Charming, but you can't forget that you are family already…at least you are to me."

"I haven't been your true step-mother for years, Snow," Regina replied.

"That may be true, but I see more of the woman that I wanted to be my second mother in you every day. I know it may be hard for you to believe, but all I ever wanted was you to love me. I didn't mean for everything that happened with Daniel to happen. No, I know, I have apologized for that too much, but honestly, to me, it will never be enough. I wanted to have a relationship with you, even though you did curse me many times and tried to kill me. I lost my mother so young and you were young and beautiful. I couldn't see passed that. I couldn't see passed my own desires. I know that is a problem for both of us."

"It is."

"But, Regina, we can be a family. We are a family. And, as a family, we will fight for each other. We will find a way. We always do," Snow added.

"For what's it is worth, I hope that the Charming luck is on our side and we do find a way."

Snow smiled. She hugged Regina, again. When she pulled back this time, Regina smiled back at her with a wide and genuine smile.

"Come with me for breakfast," Snow commanded.

"That sounds lovely, Dear," Regina replied, actually smiling.

They had a quiet breakfast in the main dining hall. Regina was actually pleasantly surprised at the rest of them. They had all determined to find joy and happiness in their situation and they had in each other's presence. She was starting to see how it would possibly benefit her to do this as well, but she reminded herself that she would still have to use this new positive energy to help her find a way back to Henry…and back to Emma.

Snow left her to her own devices. She knew it was only because she was happier this morning than she had been in months. She hadn't fought about eating and she had left her rooms without much fuss or provocation. Regina was breaking through her depression with determination. Snow saw it was going to reward it as much as she dared. She was giving Regina complete freedom without constant nagging or companionship. She could see that Regina was truly getting better.

Belle actually sought her out. She was surprised, but not as much as she would have been years ago. She had finally come to the realization that she had grown up just as much as the rest of them had. She had finally come into her own and wasn't the woman that her mother made her into being. She was more pleasant and...she felt freer.

"Regina?"

"Come in, Belle."

"Are you sure that you want to go with me?"

"Yes. I am. I need to get out of the castle. I have made it into my own personal dungeon. I need to be free of these walls for a short time to re-energize myself and to think. I can't think here right now."

"I understand that. It is why l gladly accepted Snow's invitation to come stay here for a while. I was too busy waiting for Rumple to show up back at his castle. He haunts the place. I see him everywhere. And, not having Neal there, not having anyone to really talk to, I was going crazy," Belle told her.

"Where was Neal? He left you alone there? What the hell was he doing?"

"He is like you. He is looking for a way back to Henry and Emma. He comes and goes, but he doesn't stay long. I think that he is trying to track down any and all of Rumple's old stash spots. He found some map hidden in the castle. The only time that I have seen it since he found it, I saw that he has been marking off places. I think that it is map that Rumple used years ago trying to find a portal to get to him. He looks so lost without his father. I don't know what to do for him." Belle told her.

"I know what we can do. We will find a way back. Maybe, once he gets Henry back in his life, he will see that he needs to be a father and not running around trying to bring the dead back to life. It is a hard lesson. I had to learn it. But, I see that you have come to mourn him without searching to bring him back. You seem to have taken the healthier road in your situation," Regina said.

"I don't know that I was any better than Bae when we got back here, Regina. I just didn't let it overtake me the way he did. He missed his father for so long. He got him back only to lose him and his unknown crazy grandfather in the process. I think that I can let him have his adventure in trying to find a way to bring him back. I doubt that he will be able to do it, but even I hold a slight glimmer of hope that he might succeed in his quest."

"Do honestly think that he might find a portal using Rumple's map?"

"I don't know, Regina. I haven't had time to actually study it. If I could, then maybe I could point him in the right direction. He just won't stay long enough. I think he is afraid of his father's castle, like there is still so much bad magic in the walls that he might absorb it," Belle explained.

"He never really used any magic. He shouldn't feel that strong of a pull to it. Besides, Baelfire has always done everything that he could to stay away from magic. I find it hard to believe that he was now rushing into it, knowing the price he might have to pay, in order to find his father," Regina said.

"I don't think that he is looking for Rumple. I think he is trying to find a way back to New York. He doesn't think of the Enchanted Forest as his home. His home is New York. He is looking for a way home. If for some reason that causes him to find Rumple, I think that he'll be happy with that. But to be honest with you, Regina, I don't know that he isn't looking for some magical reserve in order to bring Rumple back. If he does that, I think he might use him to find a way back to New York."

"I'll talk with him, if he comes back while I am there. That is the best I can do. He is single minded in his thinking, just like his father. I doubt that he will create some elaborate scheme in order to get back to New York, but we both know that he could. We'll just have to watch out for him," Regina stated.

"I know."

"Does it feel weird?"

"Does what feel weird?"

"The fact that your almost step-son is around your age?"

"You would know, wouldn't you? Snow is what, five years younger than you? And, don't forget that makes Emma your thirty year old step-granddaughter," Belle slated.

"Don't remind me. I am still in awe that Henry is Rumple's grandson. Who would have thought than I would end up raising Snow's and Rumple's grandson. I mean, I sure that Rumple didn't see that one coming. I doubt that he would have allowed it if he had," Regina replied.

"I know, right? Besides, if we worry about that, then that would make Henry not only your adopted son but also your step-great-grandson. It is just too much to think about."

"It is."

"I'm sorry," Belle muttered.

"For what""

"Bringing up Henry."

"I am tired of hiding. I'm tired of everyone being worried about what I'll do with having him here with mc. Yes, he is my son and I will do anything for him, but we don't need to be worried about me going off on someone because they mentioned his name. We need to find a way back," Regina said.

"Do you think that Rumple had some sort of escape plan in his castle?"

"I don't doubt that he had something, but I am afraid to figure out where it will take us if he does."

"I understand."

"I don't think that you do, dear. You've never been to Neverland. You haven't seen Wonderland. I am sure that there are lands that Rumple went to in search of his son. He had to have done so. How else would he have known to Create write the creation of Storybrooke into the Curse? He had been looking for Bae for quite some time before he met you, my dear," Regina explained, "And, we both know that he didn't give up once he acquired you."

"I know that."

"You don't think that Neal would try to portal jump without us, do you?"

"I don't know, right now. He isn't himself. He has retreated so far away that I don't believe I can get to him anymore," Belle told her.

"You want me to try?"

"I am afraid that you might be the only who can. You have magic. He might listen to that." Belle said.

"Who are you really worried about, him or yourself, Belle?" Regina asked.


	6. Road Trip

**A/N: I didn't want to put many notes in the beginning of this story, but I feel that I must for this chapter. There are two streams of conscious going on in parts. Don't worry it will be easy to understand. The italics are one and the normal font is the other. Of course they are both important to the story. Please feel free to review. I am trying to reply to everyone who does. If you have a question or possibly want me to try to add something, just let me know. Thanks for reading. ~JET**

**Road Trip**

Belle and Regina were facing each other in the covered carriage. Regina looked better than she had in days. Belle was smiling at her. Regina wasn't sure why she was so happy. She knew that Belle was hoping against hope that she would find a way to bring Rumple back. Regina didn't have a clue where to begin to start.

"Why are you really coming with me?" Belle asked.

"I'm sorry," Regina answered.

"Why are you doing this?"

"I needed to get away from Snow. I need a break. There is just too much hope in that castle. I need some reality. I need a change of scenery," Regina stated.

"I guess I can understand that."

"You can?"

"Snow can be bubbly…a lot. Sometimes her want to be right and on the side of good outweighs the complexity of the situation. She is smart and loving, but sometimes it is just too much. And, Charming is just as bad as she is. They are so preoccupied with themselves and doing things for side of Good that they don't see who they are hurting," Belle stated.

"Who are? What happened to you, Belle? Years ago, you wouldn't have dared say that."

"Time changes people. You begin to see things that you didn't before. I know that she means well but her obnoxious and infectious wanting for everyone to be hopeful gets tiring after a while. I am sure that it was the same for you. She wants you to stay hopeful that we will find a way to get back to Emma and Henry. I am sure that you want that, but I also know that you are a realist. I know that you have explored every avenue that you know of or could read about in the castle."

"I did."

"I also know, that short of recasting the curse, you haven't found anything," Belle stated.

"You're right. I haven't. I can't recast the curse, anyway. It looks like this is a lost cause. But, I don't want it to be. I want Henry and Emma to be happy…but I want to be happy, too."

"And, what would make you happy, Regina?"

"To have them both back," she replied.

"Both of them? I thought that you and Emma weren't that friendly. What happened in Neverland? Did I miss something?"

"No, we just realized that us fighting all the time wasn't good for Henry. We realized that we were more alike than we cared to admit and we would be better to each other and to Henry if we were friends. We've tried to be nicer to each other because of that. Neverland made it clearer."

"Wait…what did you mean you can't recast the curse?"

"I don't have anything that I love to sacrifice to cast. There is nothing here for me. I can't recast the curse. I knew that before we came back here," Regina told her.

"Ah…because Henry is your love," Belle stated.

"Yes…" Regina replied, and then went completely quiet.

"Don't worry, Regina. I am sure that we will find a way to get back. We have to remember not to give up hope. Snow has always had an abundance, but maybe now, we do, too."

"Hope in what?"

"In each other," Belle stated.

"That is easier said than done, Dear," Regina replied.

"For you, I am sure. I know that David and Snow are going to give up. I also know that Neal hasn't stopped looking for something since I left. He isn't going to give up until he is back with Emma and Henry. I know that you want the same thing. Maybe, he'll work with you. If he finds some sort of a magical way back. He is going to need you to help him. He doesn't have any magic of his own. Will you be willing help him?" Belle asked.

"If it will get us back, I will do anything," Regina replied.

"Rest for now, Regina. It will be a while before we get to the castle. I'll wake you before we get there. And, don't fight me on that. We both know that you need some sleep. I promise that nothing will happen to you," Belle told her.

"I am not worried about myself, Dear. I can take care of myself. But, thank you for your kindness and worry, Belle. It means a lot coming from you, especially after everything I did to you during the curse."

"That is in the past, Regina. We have to move on and come together if we want to be successful. I know that. I worked with some of the roughest men in the Enchanted Forest. You know that because you kidnapped me after I freed Philip. But, that doesn't matter now. Right now, we need to work together."

"That is true. But, I would still like to thank you for getting me away from Snow. See we are already working well together, Dear," Regina stated.

Belle just smiled at Regina. Regina smiled back and then turned to look out the window of the carriage. She watched the scenery pass them by. It had been years since she took this road. She was amazed at how much it hadn't really changed.

Suddenly she needed something more than the scenery. She was away from Snow and David. She felt it was it was safe for her to bring out her compact mirror. She watched Belle as she pulled it out. Belle wasn't paying attention to Regina and she could tell.

Regina quickly ran her thumb over the glass. She simply thought about the spell that would cause the mirror to become magical. She was rewarded. The mirror glass simmered and flashed. She gasped as she saw Henry's face in the reflection. She quickly looked over at Belle.

Belle hadn't heard her gasp. She was too preoccupied with her own thoughts. Regina didn't want to bother her with the mirror. She hoped that she could keep it a secret from Belle for now.

She looked down into the glass again. She saw Henry's smile and her heart soared. She wouldn't dare try to hear what he was doing while they were still in the carriage. She would wait until they got to Rumple's castle and she was settled. She didn't want to worry Belle. She needed to let go. She knew that she would be able to do that at Rumple's castle because she knew places that she was sure that Belle hadn't found yet. She would be able to try her experiments. She would find a way back to the Land Without Magic.

She leaned back against the bench back of the seat. She raised the mirror to her eye level. She knew that the movement caught Belle's attention this time, but Belle didn't say anything. She just smiled at Regina. She smiled back at her. Then, she pretended to study herself in the mirror. She turned her eyes out the window again and watched the trees whizzing by them. She snuck another glance at the compact and her smile broadened.

She put the mirror back into her hidden pocket. She closed her eyes and willed sleep to come. She knew that Henry was safe and happy. She knew that Emma was taking care of him. She knew that Emma was searching for happiness. They were okay. They were safe. They were working on being happy. Regina knew it that it should be enough, but it wasn't. She wasn't there to share it with them. She let sleep overtake her with the lull of the carriage rocking.

_Regina woke up in her bed back in Storybrooke. She flew out of the bed and ran to the window. She stared down at the grass and the trees. She smiled when she saw her apple tree. She felt like she was home. She couldn't believe it. She couldn't be happier._

_She ran out of her room. She was down the hall and in Henry's room before she knew what she was doing. He wasn't there. Everything was how it had always been. She ran out of the house and down the street. There was no one anywhere to be seen. _

_She realized that it had to be a dream. She wanted to wake herself up, but she couldn't. She pinched herself and it didn't rouse her. She ran further into town. She wanted to find anyone, anything, something to ground her in this dream of hers._

_There was no one in town. There was no one anywhere. Regina realized it was how she felt. She felt completely alone. She had never felt this alone even while she was under the curse. She had felt alone then, but then she got Henry. Now there was no one, nothing. It was a complete loneliness that would destroy her. She needed to find someone, something fast to ground herself._

_"Think, Regina, think," she told herself._

_She broke into Gold's shop. She ransacked the place looking for the old spell book he had taught her with. She could feel it, but she didn't find it. She kept looking hoping that he didn't have a blood lock on some hidden space where it would be._

_She hit the counter and exclaimed, "Damn it!"_

_The glass on the counter broke under her anger. She stared at the shattered wood and glass and couldn't believe that there wasn't anything in there but Charming's sword. She wondered how Gold got it back. She was sure that it was still beneath the library, but she reached down and picked it up. She admired the weight of it and couldn't believe that it hadn't killed her yet. She kept it. She didn't know why, but something told her she would need it._

_She walked back outside the shop. She was tired. She needed someone and at the moment, she didn't care who it was. She was slowly carrying the sword as she walked back down the street. She made her way back to her house._

Regina fidgeted on the seat. Belle noticed it, but she did try to wake Regina. She knew that whatever it was that Regina was working through in her dreams that she would have to do it on her own. She would let her sleep, until it looked like Regina was in distress.

She watched the emotions playing across her face. She could see her face contort in pain. She didn't know how Regina would react when she woke her. She leaned forward and placed a hand on her knee. She watched as Regina moved her hands across her lap. Belle questioned the movement when she noticed that Regina's hand disappeared inside her dress. She leaned back and wondered what it was that Regina was after inside her own skirts. She quit questioning when she noticed that she was calming down.

Regina wrapped her hand around the mirror in her pocket. Somehow in her subconscious it helped her. She didn't know that she had done it, though. She was still plagued by her dreams.

_She reached her house. The walk had been longer than she remembered. She still had Charming's sword in her hand. It was still a strange thing for her to have, but holding it she felt closer to Henry and Emma. She didn't know what it meant. She held it up in front her face and studied the blade. It was then that she noticed her apple tree just past the sword. _

_She lowered the sword and drug it across the lawn as she stepped slowly towards her beloved Honeycrisp Apple tree. She swore that it wasn't sick before she went to town. She wondered if it was a reflection of how she felt. The dream was destroying her sanity slowly. She knelt down in front of the tree and touched the bark. A big chuck came off at her touch and fell in front of her._

_She dropped the sword by her side. Her hands went to the trunk of her tree. She willed her power and magic into it. She willed it to get better. She saw a flicker of purple smoke and a simmer in the leaves of the tree. _

_"What are you doing?" a voice boomed._

_Regina turned around, still kneeling. She reached down and put her hand on the hilt of the sword and felt a wave of comfort come over her. She turned to find herself face to face with herself, well more appropriately Regina Mills was face to face with the Evil Queen._

_"What are you doing?" the queen asked her._

_"Tending to my tree," Regina replied._

_"That is my tree. Who are you? What are you doing here?"_

_"That is my house. I created it when I cast the curse. What are you doing here? Who are you?"_

_"My name is Regina, Queen of the Winterlands. I've been here since the curse was cast. I knew that the tree was my only way out. Who are you?"_

_"I am Regina Mills, Mayor of Storybrooke," Regina replied as she stood up._

_"We are one in the same?"_

_"It would appear so. You've been here since I cast the curse? Why haven't we met before?"_

_"Not that curse, Dear. I have been stuck here in this…this…place since you cast the counter-curse to Pan's version. There is no one else here."_

_"You're alone?"_

_"That is what it means when I said that there was no one else here," the queen replied._

_"I have to find a way to Henry. Can you help me? Is there anything that you can tell me?"_

_"No, there isn't. I've tried to see him on my mirrors, but I can't. To tell you the truth, I am glad. Seeing him would hurt me more than not having him. At least this way, I can believe that he is happy and safe with …her."_

_"He is."_

_"You've seen him?" _

_"In our mirrors back in the White Winter Castle," Regina answered._

_"He is our weakness…"_

_"He is our love. Mother did always say that love was weakness. We would do anything for him. You are looking for a way to get back to him."_

_"Yes, I am."_

_"Are you going to tell the idiots that you aren't looking for a way to take them?"_

_"Not yet. I want to make sure that I know I have a way to get there first. Right now, I have nothing. I tried Gold's shop already and found nothing. I am now just as stuck here as you are. I have no answers," Regina told her._

_"But, that isn't true. You have the mirrors and you have your dreams. You will be able to find a way. I know that you will. Don't give up. You'll find a way back to them. Because you have something that I never did," the queen explained._

_"Yeah, and what the Hell is that?"_

_"Faith and hope."_

_Regina shook her head. She was just as lost as her queen self. She had no way back._

_"Wake up, Regina. Realize what you have, what you can have again. Once you realize that you have the power to find the way you will. Keep doubting and beloved tree will keep suffering. If the tree dies, our sanity will as well. I don't know if that will give you some sort of push into looking harder or what will. I will do what I can, but you have the power inside yourself to get back. Find the way, Regina. FIND IT and FIND HENRY."_

_"Don't you think that I have been trying?"_

_"Quit trying. Start believing. Henry has the heart of the truest believer. You are his mother. Prove it. Believe in yourself and the magic possess. Believe in the power of love."_

_"Love…Emma…."_

_The ground before them shook and a portal opened. The swirling ground opened and they both took a step back before they were both sucked inside. Regina reached up and grabbed an apple and took a bite. She threw it at the queen who then took a bite._

_"What are you waiting for, Regina? Your hope…your love…is inside there. Go to her. Tell her the truth and find your way to Henry," the queen told her as she pushed Regina into the swirling purple and blue portal._

_"She'll help you find the way back…trust in her and your love for each other!" Regina heard the queen yell to her as she fell into the portal, still clutching Charming's sword._

_The queen watched the portal close. She looked at the still sick tree, but she saw a glimmer of hope. Regina needed to learn to follow her heart. If not everything would be lost._

_"We don't have much time, Regina. Find a way to make her love you, again. She'll help you stay sane and she'll give you the idea on how to come back to your beloved Storybrooke. Trust your heart and where it is leading you. Or, we will both go crazy…and we both know that will not turn out well for anyone. We have nothing but our own heart to use to cast the curse. Suicide doesn't sound like our happy ending. Find her, Regina, and tell her you love her."_


End file.
